Why do the words, “my child is reading” out of the parent of a preschooler strike fear into the minds of the average (or not so average) parent. It’s not like we would feel that same pang of anxiety if another parent said, “my child is doing complex algebra.” Then we’d just assume that child was eccentric or was some mathematical genius. But reading, that’s something that becomes a competitive issue.
Like many of the other developmental stages–when a child first crawls, when a child takes his first steps, when they speak their first words, a parent is always questioning whether their child is within the “norm.” But why? Why is it that the way we judge whether our child is normal-especially when it comes to reading-is by comparing them to other children? My theory is that the natural curiosity to compare turns into competition–especially once they’ve started school.
For me it seems to perpetuate a culture that is hell bent on creating more division rather than cooperative learning. Making sure a child has a “leg up” over the others becomes consuming and seems to make up for other shortcomings that they might see in their child.
My children are 5 and they are doing many wonderful things. They are socially very well integrated, well liked and have lots of friends. They are emotionally very mature; they share, take turns and use their words. They know their letter sounds, they love to practice their writing and they create wonderfully imaginative stories. But, alas, they can’t read yet.
I’m not worried and I know there is time. I hold out hope that when they do start reading they’ll love it. That reading will take them to places they can’t even imagine. That they, like my friend’s 10 year old daughter, will have their noses in the latest Harry Potter book without being able to put it down!
Posted on January 18th, 2006 by Sam
Filed under: Uncategorized
It is a silly anxiety that many of seem to share! Children learn to speak, walk and read at their own pace and we should not expect them to learn at the “average” time.
For instance, people fuss when babies aren’t walking before their first birthday, yet the average age for walking is 13 months.
My children have been book lovers since infancy, but both became fluent readers only last year at 9 years old and 6 years old. They have different learning styles, one a long curve, need to know the whole theory, learner– the other a short burst, learn it right now learner. The oldest now confidently reads adult materials at almost 10 years old and my daughter is probably capable of the same if she ever sat still long enough.
I’m sure your children love books. They might not if “having to learn to read” was foisted upon them.