Tonight I was reading with my 6 year old daughter. She started kindergarten this year and is a beginning reader. I’ve always been an avid reader, been a member of a book club for years and was reading “Black Beauty” and falling in love with every word when I was 8. I’ve waited for this moment for so long I can’t begin to tell you. The moment when my children would discover words and worlds through them.
There’s only one problem. Beginning reading is slow and arduous. While the early reading books are repetitive with simple text, it’s still a process to sound out every syllable of every word. And then there’s the fidgeting and distraction. Staying focused is a constant challenge. I’ve been trying so hard to be patient and not to get frustrated but inevitably it slips out. On one page we were reading tonight the word, “bad” was written 15 times. When I tried to explain to my daughter that “bad” was always going to be “bad” no matter what sentence it was in she started to well up. “Mommy, you’re talking really mean to me.” She was right. I was being mean to her—more like sarcastic. It was a bad mommy moment.
I’m not sure why I needed to write this post other than the need to share and hope that anyone who has had this same experience has some solutions. I promised never to suck the life out of my daughters learning experience no matter what. I blew it tonight.
Posted on March 4th, 2007 by Sam
Filed under: Uncategorized
Dear Blew It Tonight,
Let’s start with you.
Bless your heart and throw yourself a life preserver cause you might be going overboard! Remember, you love her and you’re doing the best you can because you care. Perfection is a fantasy. Don’t obsess or be too hard on yourself. Kids don’t come with instruction books and you have only been doing this for 6 years. Everytime you think you’ve got her figured out, she grows and changes on you. As with anything else, good parenting takes practice. stay enthusiastic about sharing your love of reading. It’s infectious! In no time, she’ll be bringing the same books for you to read to her several times a day. make it a game by counting with her how many times she asks you to read the books. I promis you, it will be alot more fun that being stessed.
The great news is that your daughter seems to enjoy the experience of reading and being read to. This is golden! Whatever you do, DO NOT make it a chore or stressful experience for her. At her age, beginning readers should be praised and guided tenderly, at all costs. learning to read is a process; it will not happen over night. deon’t push, pull or struggle. Be pacient. She will still be able to get into college.
Keep smiling,
Mr. Cid
I loved your post–thanks for the “free” pass. I do know that it’s a process and over time I hope my children will share the same joy I do with reading. We’re starting to read “The Hobbit” with me reading about 2 pages a day. I think I’ll get through it in the same time that they’ll be ready to read it themselves! Visit often.